On some pleasant day of August, 2004, a demure, meek and mild girl entered the gates of Laurels School International, Indore
That girl was me…
Yes, I cherish the significance of Laurels in my life, the journey I undertook five years ago, has really been like a fancy trip, which, though ephemeral, has left an indelible mark on my heart and soul. When I give a glance at the past, I see a plethora of gifts- joy and jubilation as well as trials and tribulations, fulfillments and disappointments, Laurels has given me all…
But one day, while I still basked in the blissful pleasure and security of being a school-going girl, life hurled a challenge at me…my class 12th Board Exams were over, and we had to relocate to my hometown, Kolkata…And it happened much faster than I could actually contemplate …Life was altogether drastically different, and I had to undergo a complete metamorphosis to meet the demands of the present. I broke off the cocoon of the ‘coy’, ‘reserved’ girl as I was known at Laurels, shed off her old skin entirely and moulded myself anew. The crucial time for me was at the doorstep, and I had to step in to the big, bad world…there was not the ever-familiar school-bus waiting at my stop every morning, n dropping me home in afternoons, in which I could unperturbedly occupy a comfortable seat for myself and gaze reflectively from the window, all the way to school…Here, it was just the contrary. There was hardly a moment to pause and ponder- life was always on the run!!!! And we had to keep up to its frenetic pace….
At Laurels, people knew me, I had an entity, I got ample appreciation for my achievements, but here, even recognition of one’s existence did not come easy… I had to jostle and wrestle in the race for survival amidst a crowd of millions…it was a never-ending competition! I had left far behind the pampered and protected school-days, here I was my own anchor…When I finally entered college, fresh realizations dawned on me- on rare occasions someone does communicate any updates or information in class, its all up to us to acquaint ourselves with the latest happenings of the campus…during examinations, nobody cared to caution you that it’s already time, it’s you who has to take care of that and report to the hall accordingly- if you are late, you bear the consequences…and to deal with the web of diplomacy, manipulations and so-called “professionalism” was a different ball-game altogether!!! Once an over- sensitive, vulnerable girl myself, I had to read through masked countenances…
But that naïve, innocent school-girl is not absolutely lost, though circumstances have compelled her to be relegated to the back-seat, I’ve still tenderly preserved her in a corner of my being, as I feel incomplete without her, she’s my everlasting companion in solitude, when, weary and worn-out by the daily humdrum grind, I indulge myself to a walk down the memory lane to revisit my halcyon days, and escape fleetingly into the Utopian world…
Often, in these blissful reminisces and retrospection of the golden moments, I bump into that ‘me’ and every teenage fantasy that made her globe…In fact, I got to know her better after undergoing life’s unforeseen experiences. And those invaluable glimpses of silent introspection sweeten the agony of nostalgia and lets me relive the Shinjana that I actually am and love to be…that is my answer to life : though I am malleable, I am not ductile!!!
That was a rite of passage for me, and so is this transition. Both have given me a varying slice of life and have been milestones, marking my growth as an in individual. Today, standing at this critical juncture, I can strongly assert that the ‘steel’ in me has come to the fore and I won’t succumb, but hold on and take life in its stride…
SHINJANA MUKHERJEE
ISC-2009
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